This week is part of the holiday season and also the week I celebrate my birthday. I was able to take a day off from work and I enjoyed just being with my family today. We had errands to run, so we were busy with that most of the day. Not quite the way most people celebrate, but it works for us.
My husband asked if I felt any different from yesterday, I laughed and said no. For the most part, I feel like the same person today, that I was yesterday and there is still part of me that is a young woman trying to figure out life, a young mother wondering if things will ever change change and a young girl convinced that I would never get any older. That last moment, as a young girl, desperately wanting to be older than nine years old and suddenly sure that nothing would change. I would always be small and somehow time would skip over me and I would always be nine years old. Time proved me mostly wrong, yet partly right. Physically, I have changed, gotten older, a bit creakier, but mentally, there are days I feel exactly like my nine year old self who thought that things would never change. I suspect I have changed mentally, not my memories but how I view those memories is different from that nine year old self of so many years ago.
As I write this, it’s a wintry evening here, at least it is for Southern California. It rained most of the day and was a bit chilly instead of the usual sunny day with a few clouds floating by. Not exactly the snow covered landscape in Christmas cards and movies but I’ve grown used to it and appreciate our winters more than I used to. I used to regret the lack of snow, I don’t do that as much, perhaps I am getting wiser as I get older. Have a good holiday season and may everyone find time to enjoy the moments in between the hustle and bustle of activities for this time of year.
Pictures by J.T. Harpster
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